Wednesday, August 2, 2017

My Friend Uses A Sugar Daddy But Here’s Why I’m Not Worried About Her

When people hear the phrase “Sugar Baby” or “Sugar Daddy” there is a sudden change of tone in the conversation from light hearted jokes to repulsion, bewilderment, or plain curiosity. In today's world, a sugar baby is typically a part of a physical and emotional companionship in exchange for money. However, that is not ALWAYS the case, which is a common misconception. My friend is a young, intelligent, funny and energetic millennial that is naive enough to play along but not stupid enough to get heavily involved. 

She is also, conclusively, a Sugar Baby.

It is all about the initial meet. How you meet a sugar daddy indicates a lot about how the relationship will develop. If you meet a sugar daddy at the club, or online I would bet the odds are pretty high that it is going to lead to a lot of late nights which will result in the prominent stereotype of what a sugar daddy is after. My friend, we will call her Rebecca, was introduced by her supervisor to her sugar daddy as a networking connection. There were no premeditated notions this would turn into a sugar daddy-sugar baby relationship, which was the primary kicker for me.

One dinner led to two dinners, which led to drinks, which lead to a plethora of opportunities. This guy, we will call him Hector, is an older, successful, traditional male who just highly enjoyed Rebecca's company. What can I say, the girl is extremely comfortable to be around. At this point, I just thought they were hanging out and getting to know one another. It was an entirely innocent relationship to start, and I found normalcy in her connections with him. She would always tell me when she was going out with him, and I expected not to hear from her for the rest of the night because Rebecca never checked her phone when she was with him. Imagine having so much fun with someone you forget you even have a phone, crazy right? I usually gave her 24 hours to make contact with me before I would actually start to wonder. She never missed her window.

It was when she told me he invited her to fly her out of the country with him for about two weeks when she and I realized this was more than just a networking connection now.

Girl, you got yourself a sugar daddy.

Traveling Rebecca was hesitant about, and rightfully so. It is not every day someone offers to pay for your passport, fly you out of the country, and have everything paid for along the way. It was a  business trip for him, and he innocently wanted some company along for the ride. She got a lot of spit back when she explained the situation to her loved ones. You can't just pull a Bella, fly to another country and leave a note. Those were some tough conversations but legally she was free to do what she wanted and ultimately decided to go. Proud of you girl; because I was honestly not worried. She is a tough girl with a good sense of fight or flight and right or wrong. We made some safety arrangements JUST INCASE things got shady on the island. Surprise surprise, she came back in one piece and having the time of her life. From then on out their relationship was taken to the next level.

As a young millennial just trying to make it in the world, she had a regular paying job with a normal working schedule. Hector acknowledged that. He paid for her dental work, repaired her car, gave her shopping money and still took her out to the finest bars for wining and dining. How could you worry about a relationship like that? He is taking these hardships away from her so she can focus on being successful in the future.

Still to this day I have not met this gentleman in person. I've seen their texts, and I've heard their conversations. Nothing about this is sexually motivated. This is purely two generations that happen to see eye to eye, which I think is great since the rest of the world seems to be so torn by age gaps. 


  1. This was so incredibly interesting to read! A friend of mine got into sugar babying for a little while just to help with money, and hearing about it from her made me realize that some of these men genuinely just want good company. Loved reading about this and your thoughts on it.


  2. No offense, but this sounds creepy af. My friend once considered becoming a sugar baby at UC Berkeley and all the guys that contacted were definitely sexually motivated. It sounds like you're kind of overlooking the obvious: a lot of these guys are scumbags and even the ones that aren't basically view women, and our company, as a commodity to pay for. You're a 20-something, so you probably don't get just how creepy these guys can be. I hope you do some learning and some growing up.


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